The Fast and the Serious

"To be good is noble, but to teach others how to be good is nobler - and less trouble."
-Mark Twain -

Until this week my students saw me as the fun teacher who had games in every class, who told funny stories about America, and who used technology to teach English instead of a chalk board. My co-teacher even said that my students really enjoy my classes and thought they were fun. Fun can be subjective, though. This really encouraged me, because personally I think I'm a complete n00b in this teaching business.

So, I'm doing my job right. Right? Apparently, not so much. This week the students have been acting like spoiled little shits, and what I found out they did today took the cake.

Let me give you a little background. I'm the new guy. I'm also their first foreign teacher. On top of that, I'm also the youngest teacher here. The school, which has about 500-700 boys enrolled, decided to pimp my classroom, so that I can teach in a more modern environment and thus engage their little shit-head brains. This was incredibly generous of the school, because (a) I got new computers, (b) my class overlooks the city of Busan, and (c) I have this really great projector to teach lessons on. I was grateful to the principal, thanking him endlessly for giving me such a cool classroom.

Cut to this week where Monday set my mood for the rest of the week. Apparently, my nice-guy attitude with the kids probably gave them the impression that I'm a pretty lax teacher that overlooks mischief. Usually I have a lot of fun with my students when I teach. But on Monday the freshman class didn't pay attention to the lesson and when asked a question to test if they were listening, some would answer "I don't know." Fine, if you don't know, I'll explain again. Which I did. And then I'd re-ask the question. "I don't know," would be the answer yet again.

The senior classes were really good, so props to them. But, the freshman I could bang their heads against the wall.

This happened on Monday and Tuesday. I thought perhaps the lesson was too hard for the freshman class and I needed to redo it to make it easier to comprehend. So, I let their shenanigans go.

Let's cut again to today. My main co-teacher (I have five co-teachers) gets called into the Vice Principal's office. After their meeting, co-teacher pulls me aside and says that the VP is livid. I found out that some students stole computer parts from my classroom! Mouse pads, letters from the keyboard, and some mice (mouse) were missing! I'll remind you that this classroom probably cost the school about $5,000 US dollars to pimp out for the new guy. Now they moved me to another classroom. A much more ghetto classroom that has a chalkboard, no projector, and right next to the bathroom! It starts to smell like diarrhea 15 minutes into class.

I was beyond pissed today. My personality did a complete 360 today. Usually the routine is:
Student: "Hi Parro Sun Seng Nim" (that's teacher in Korean and they also can't say my name right)
Me: "Anyeonghaseyo. What's going on?"
Student: "Fine, I rike the weather. I rike it arot."

Today's routine post bad news:
Students: "Hi Parro Sun Seng Nim"
Me: "Be quiet and sit down."
Students: "Okay! Sorry sorry!"
Me: "Today, I am angry at all of you. I lost my classroom, because someone destroyed the school's computers."

At this point some of the students were giggling, and one particular boy was making remarks like "Oh, so sorry! So sorry!" and snickering. I walked over to his desk and calmly said "Funny, huh?" He looked up and exclaimed "Yes! Very funny!" I told him to stand up. He was looking around the class to see if anyone of his compatriots could help him out. And then I shouted "GET - UP!"

The room got quiet. Even my co teacher said "Oooh." The boy stood up and I yanked his chair towards the wall. I told the boy he was going to stand up for the remainder of the class. "Not so funny now, huh?" I asked him as he looked like he was about to cry. My co-teacher demanded he answer my question. He bowed to me and whispered "Yes, Paolo Sun Seng Nim." Humiliating them in front of their peers, I learned, is a good form of punishment.

I really wanted to pull a Cartman.
It was surreal. I didn't think I'd have to yell at these kids so soon into my job. I was more disappointed than mad to be honest. I had complete trust in these kids to treat their school with more respect, like how the Principal trusted me with all that expensive technology they bestowed upon me. I lectured them for about 20 minutes. I said things like "If you ever disrespect my classroom again, you're going to the office" and "I bet your parents would love to find out what you did". I just threw some words around as I was lecturing them, and then I stopped for a second realizing I was sounding like my dad. It was freaking me out. I almost looked into my reflection half expecting to see my dad looking back at me.

So, I was pissed. I feel better now. I had these pancake things that they sell on the streets. They are really good and so cheap. Probably cost about fifty cents. It's what we're eating on that picture up top. Some of them have syrup inside. Really good.

Anyway, I had to get that out of my system. I thought I was probably too harsh with my language, but I lost a really great classroom. The other teachers said they would have done worse. Did I mention most of the teachers here carry wooden sticks? Not even joking. But, I'm glad my getting mad at the kids happened, because now they will see me more of an authoritative figure.

And, one more thing, the Principal is out of town for a meeting and doesn't know what happened to the computers. So, Monday is going to be fun.